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"Let's start with preparation," says Miss Constance, a lifestyle dominatrix with 16 years experience who's asked to be credited with that pseudonym. "This means preparing your submissive psychologically for BDSM play, whatever that may constitute. It usually involves getting to a place of deep relaxation which makes the submissive docile and receptive to instruction, both verbal and physical. "I am deeply ritualistic and find this to be very effective. I choose an appropriate outfit for myself and my submissive and then I provide him with very clear, basic instructions, such as telling him to sit or kneel in a certain position. I will then ask a series of questions, some of which will be repeated several times for the sake of reinforcement. When I am happy with the responses, I will begin the session.
"Once I am happy that my submissive is ready I will start to reward positive behaviour and obedience with both verbal and physical rewards. The goal is to reward 'good' behaviour and punish disobedience or mistakes.
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